Addio Londra!

Ready, set, jet! In three weeks I will be cruising my way around the ol' boot, Italy, of course! I am so fucken excited. 10 days of warm sun, great food, and hot Italian stallions (I hope) ! What more could any girl ask for? Oh yeah, great art too. Hee hee. Actually, Italy has 60% of the world's most important works of art...sweeeet, I know. Half of these are located in Florence. We will be flying into Florence to kick off our trip. Then we will head to Venice and back down to Roma, where we will meet my Tio who lives on a vineyard. I don't mind picking grapes! Maybe some hot Italian will see me working hard, and stop by to help and feed me some....must get my head out of the boy clouds! Shesh! What's wrong with me? Today at work, the girls & I were really bored and we were laughing at all the phallic shaped carrots there were. Ha ha. These carrots were monstrous and shaped, well lets just say, in my experience, they would put most men to shame. Ha ha. I'll take a pic of one just to prove it. Good immature times at the caff.

Miss You Much!!

I really adapted to my environment here in London. There aren't many things I miss from home that I can't do without here. But I do miss a few luxuries!

1) I MISS DRIVING MY CAR!!! Maaaaaan, I really do! But then again the thought of learning to drive stick using my left hand is a scary thought. Not to mention the steering wheel location (opposite side of the car) and the roads being backwards! Combine that with their tiny streets, mass jay-walkers, and weirdo street signs = a disaster waiting to happen. I would kill someone on the first day!!

2) I MISS ICE!! This is my own hang up, probably. I need extra ice in everything, (including my milk!), I'm weird! In London, two cubes in your coke is good enough. So when I tell them "extra ice please", they put 3 cubes in my glass. Some places don't carry ice at all...including some movie theatres!! Hello! Oh well. I can always chisel some off the windshield of the cars in the morning. I guess I can get used to luke warm soda. I already got used to luke warm beer and I kinda like it now. ; )

3) I MISS PICANTE CORN NUTS!! Brits don't have picante anything. Luckily my BFF sent me Pico De Gallo seasoning!!


So, you better appreciate the great fact that you can pretty much get ANYTHING in the USA!! Enjoy it!!

Summer, Summer Time

I have to admit lately it feels as tho it's winter all over again here in London. I know now why the brits are so reserved! They are so damn cold & wet all the time! I can't even imagine spending another winter here, oh my gawd, I would die, I tell you. First, it gets dark at 3! Then if that's not depressing enough, it's too cold & wet out side to even want to venture out. During the winter, my roommates and I had nap-fests. "Let's just take a nap guys!" But luckily that's all changing. All the trees are in full bloom and the sun is out more...it still rains some but that will never change. I learned to just deal with my frizzy wet head look. Hey! Everyone has it. It's the latest craze, didn't you know? It's on all the runways. Okay maybe not, but you don't know. Besides it goes great with the sloppy just out-of-bed BOHO look anyway. And just an FYI, that look is so over. I hope you didn't invest too much money at Urban Outfitters. But ne way back to what I was saying, it's now British Summer Time, which means it doesn't get dark until 8.30pm!! Whoo-hoo! It's so great. I have way too many hours in the day now to fill. I'm serious. I hear during the real summer it doesn't get dark until almost 11pm! OMG!! I can't wait! Now if only the sun would actually warm us up over here.

No Love, No Glory

When you have the chance to deal with other peeps problems (Hey, OPP! - But that means something else!)...some how it makes your probs seem not as bad. And after having numerous chat-outs with various friends about my dilemma, I think I came to a decision about my trip (should I stay or should I go?) but I won't talk about it just yet. I might change my mind later. I am, after all, a Libra, and a v. Indecisive person at that. I have to weight out all the options first, then break em up, then I have to make sure my desicion doesn't hurt anyone or make anyone feel intentionally bad, then I have to make sure it's legal & moral...ha ha (not really ; ) But I think I did come to a better conclusion. The bottom line is...This is MY LIFE. And I don't want to regret anything. I have to stop worrying so much about other people's needs and be selfish for once. I left LA in the first place so I can be selfish and think about myself for once. Yet, I'm still worried about other people here. Bad habits are hard to break, I guess.

But back to all the other people's probs I'm dealing with right now. My little friend Estes, got dumped! The jerk - of course he's to blame! ; ) But I cant help but feel her pain. It's too bad she's in Taiwan right now. If she was back in the UK, I would be ready- set with the Ben & Jerry's & "man size" tissues...not to mention the chocolate fest we would have...then followed by the vino. Yessssss, lots of the good stuff. Then I would send her off with a lovely English rebound lad! And if she smoked out, we could have gotten a little high too. Oh well, it's too bad she's not here. I guess I will have to do all that for her! It will be in her honor, of course! ;) She will be with me in spirit. Hee hee.

More probs:
I'm also dealing with my two Polish roomates not speaking to each other. And guess who's stuck in the middle playing referee?? (me!) It's a good for them I'm not an instigator! I know all the shit they talk about each other.

And Lastly:
The owners of the cafe are driving me nuts! The husband owner cheated on the wife owner. OMG! Guess who is stuck in the middle again! I know everything too. It's so drama here! He tells me things and says, "Please don't tell Julie." She tells me things, and says, "Please, I only trust you." OMG! Can someone please poke my eyes out for me. But I do reap the benefits for putting up with all their crap right now. I'm like a kid going thru the struggles of their parents divorce. Both parents are giving up the goodie gifts-- out of guilt. Guess who's their baby?? See, what happens when your not an instigator?? I try and be a sound board and they just puke up their soul on me. Keep those guilt stricken weekly bonuses coming guys! My services ain't cheap!

Running On EMPTY !

I can't sleep! I can't sleep! No amount of sheep counting will work. I was in the thousands before I gave up! I'm getting those anxious feelings again. It happened before. Actually it happened right before I moved to London. I had that rushed feeling of time running out on me. Who the hell made up "time" anyway!? I only have 2 months left and it's clearly not enough time! I need to stay longer. I want to stay longer. I can't stay longer. I already promised my parents, friends, my dog...etc that I'd be back by the end of June. Actually, I have two close family weddings to attend as well. I'M NOT READY TO COME BACK YET. I just don't know what to do. And I can't just come back for a visit bc the UK will not let me back into the country (visa issues). What do I do? Do I tell them the truth?? (I don't want to come back right now. I want to come back after summer.) Am I an evil daughter? And every time I causally mention that I am not ready to come back, they get offended. My bestfriend doesn't even seem to understand either. She can't understand how I can be away from my friends & family for so long and not want to come back yet. The thing is I do miss them. I miss them all v. much. (I'm homesick on a weekly basis)But I'm just not ready to come back yet. It's that simple. I came all this way to "find myself" and to collect my thoughts and to finish my portfolio and in that process I came to realize I'm more confused then ever before. I want to feel peace with myself before I decide to come home. I'm not at peace yet. Am I just scared? Am I being a big baby? Should I just suck it up and grow up?